If real life were a romantic comedy, your love affair would probably be something like this: The last sweet moment would make you look into each other’s eyes and know deep down that you’re the one from the first “hello.” Then there’s a montage of baking together (with flour everywhere), sunset walks, holding hands, and maybe a few tandem bike rides. But real-life dating and love in affair aren’t quite like that. The early stages of love in love in affair can be challenging to manage, and they can either help or harm the long-term success of your relationship. Focus on the present, not the past. It’s normal to bring your fears and past experiences into a new love in a love in affair. After all, it’s a way to protect your heart from getting hurt again. But those old fears and insecurities can stop don’t assume your new partner is the same just because it’s a love in affair? Focus on the qualities that make your new partner special. If he’s been trustworthy so far, then you should trust him. Discussing your dating history will be important later, so doesn’t rush it. On your first dates, please get to know your partner’s likes, dislikes, dreams, and personality as they learn about you. There’s no need to talk about what went wrong in your last love in affair on a first date or ask about their past before you even know their siblings’ names or where they grew up. Talk about the future from the start. While you shouldn’t focus on the past, you should consider the future. Don’t wait until after a year of dating to find out that you don’t want to get married if necessary. It isn’t always fun to talk about life goals, religion, marriage, politics, etc., but having these conversations is essential so you’re on the same page. If you’re looking for a long-term or more casual relationship, make that clear from the beginning. The person you’re in an affair with is just someone you’re in an affair with. When you focus too much on a happy ending, you risk putting other people in the wrong category (or not wanting to be with them) or forcing a spark. You might miss red flags or failures because your mind has already convinced itself that it has to work. Instead, look at your partner as they are. Suppose you’re not the one he’s supposed to be with. Would he still want to spend time with you? If you enjoy his company so much that you’d like to be with him even if he wasn’t the one, then you’re probably attracted to him, not just because of the love in affair. This should go without saying, but if you don’t feel comfortable talking about sexual pornoproxy with your partner, then you’re not ready for intimacy (or maybe it’s not someone you should be with). Talk about what you like, what you don’t like, and what you’re okay with — and listen to them without judgment. Oh, and don’t forget that the “right time” for intimacy is different for every couple (ignore the “three-date rule” or any other nonsense). Remember, it’s not enough for just one person to feel smart — you must be on the same page.
